I hate the roses

a sequence,

an alternate universe

growing up,

would I be happy?

watching the lines on your face

draw around yours eyes,

your smile

your temples,

changing from black to snow

 

it hurts,

it breaks,

watching a boy the other day,

when he cried out to mummy

why don’t I know?

what it is?

how it is?

to run into a mother’s arms

Did I forget?

 

Was I reminded?

of a face I once knew

looking back into the old days

when this heart graced in naivety

when foolishness was no crime

and fear was adventurous

“Mother”

“I cant hold on”

“I cant hold on!”

 

these blurry faces are deceitful

despicable

traded my soul for dust

can’t roses be roses?

without the snakes,

crawling inside their gardens

it hurts,

it breaks,

Would I love again?

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tears to the skies

​screams,

and hundred dollar bills

 

a squeaking bed

Working behind closed doors,

pleasures known to a faceless man

 

she suffocates in her tears

“I am happy or sad?”

she wonders

 

It feels so wrong,

but so right

Is this where I belong?

 

within a rush of a fading high,

and the agony of a broken heart

 

my waning spirit,

it drifts in this endless cosmos

as I watch its infinite stars,

burning out,

one at time,

 

to when I become devoured,

into its black hole

with my tears to the skies

 

 

A life to give

Someday you look through the window and it’s all just the same

An overgrown lawn and broken mailbox 

Surrounded by wild flowers whose color became one with the shade of your tearful heart

And not the joy of a bright sunrise could cheer you up
But a dying flame,
Lone in a black universe
With a rapture dawning,
You may shut your eyes 

to his last breath.

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