LIES AND PAIN

WHEN I SIT WITH MY ARMS,

AROUND MY LEGS

MY HEART STRETCHING SO THIN

THE GOOD WAS A SHADE

I AM NOW SO COLD

IS THIS HOW IT FEELS TO LOSE?

HOPE

DEATH BE MY BRIDE

I VOW TO SADNESS

I CAN’T FIGHT ANYMORE

AND YET I STILL SEARCH THE SUN

 

 

 

HOPE

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Scars of addiction

It is the guilt,
Regret, plunging self-esteem
Hate, worthlessness,
Prejudice, hopelessness,
Secrecy, deception,
Desire, emptiness,
Rage, craziness,
Weakness, satisfaction,
Relief, anguish,
Brokenness, betrayal,
Joy, thrill,
Sadness, anger,
Hurt, misery,
Abuse, depression,
Loneliness, boredom,
Power, control,
Dreams, fantasies,
Violence, and suicide
That wound up,
The scars of addiction

image

Why foolish heart? (Your shadow I remember)

Am not angry that you didn’t show up,
But at my heart for hoping, even when it was clear,
That it was your shadow I saw,
When you turned to walk away from me

A blackish figure moving far away with each step
Head low,
Hands loosely swinging on your shoulders
Striding through piles of snow

Never looked back, not even once
Why, did I leave the door open?
In the freezing nights of the winter
As I lay in my bed, cold, never warm

I was scared of the dark,
Afraid to fall asleep in a lone bed,
Forsaken by night’s dreams of paradise
But vivid nightmares that you hated me

Burnt all my oil in the lantern,
Never had enough you know,
So I always borrowed some cents to cover the next nights
And yet those too hardly helped

But thanks to the moon,
On some nights, I sat by the door,
Looked at her, swim in the vast dark greyish sky
Despite being alone, she always made her way

And so, I hoped foolishly,
Believing you were my moon,
That you would always find your way
And I see you did,

But not to the doorstep of my heart,
But another, and so it aches,
From the long cracks running,
From the roof to its foundation

Why foolish heart?
The naivety of a young mind,
Now wrinkles of an old soul we nurse
Like grief, why this much pain?

Why do I still hope?
Even now, that my eyes water,
As my heart bleeds from these deep painful cuts
Why foolish heart? WHY?!

Lyrical beats and a magical voice

Smooth words of a magical voice
Sway a caged heart of a humble soul,
Falling innocently for the tender sounds of the alphabet

The saxophones of love,
With the drumbeats of the heart
Echo trumpets of bliss

Trapped within rhythms of a hymn
The red rose in the beak of a white dove,
Flying above a beautiful sunrise

Lyrical, pure, and divine,
An upsurge of burning flames,
In the hells of strong affections

Where lovers ache of heartbreaks,
Zoned in the high walls of friendship
A no man’s land between kisses and hugs

And far north of the blade of hate,
But close enough to feel,
The cold slices of its sharp edges in the air

So why do we love?
Again and again,
That we can only see through a glass wall, why?

Tatters of trust

The blades of betrayal cut deep,
Through the fabrics of the heart

A world never the same again
Contrastive, a true self revealed

The hypocritical roses of love,
Lying in these webs of deceit,

Lured by soft words of a smooth tongue
To be broken at the cliff of bliss

Now, fallen to the dark world of the unforgiving,
A vindictive soul garbed in tatters of trust

Fatal vengeance

Reality unravells like a new day
Bright enough to admire the overwhelming beauty

And then, watching in detail,

Your hellish nightmares breath fire onto your soul
Engraving images on the walls of your mind

Trapping thyself in a ruined past

The conflicting present,  to that future you yearned for
As your feet are buried in the ground

By a moving sand erasing your tomorrow

The huge storm and ripples,
From your unjustly actions
When greed reigned in thy heart

within wooden frames

Blinding light, deafening echoes,

Suffocating breath, a burning taste,

And a freezing breeze,

Into the unknown, swirling, infinite thoughts

Deluded, by love, and beauty,

Malicious smiles, tender words

Stabbed, hypocrite, arrogant,

Her fine robe, high soles

Luscious lips, her kiss of death,

                Warm, and cold, dying

Sucking, his life force, an ending breath

A heart stolen, and now, freezing,

Buried, in hate, and yet,

Undead, looped in the past,

Faint ink, on a lover’s canvas,

Psyched, trapped, within, the wooden frames

 

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