Am not angry that you didn’t show up,
But at my heart for hoping, even when it was clear,
That it was your shadow I saw,
When you turned to walk away from me
A blackish figure moving far away with each step
Hands loosely swinging on your shoulders
Striding through piles of snow
Never looked back, not even once
Why, did I leave the door open?
In the freezing nights of the winter
As I lay in my bed, cold, never warm
I was scared of the dark,
Afraid to fall asleep in a lone bed,
Forsaken by night’s dreams of paradise
But vivid nightmares that you hated me
Burnt all my oil in the lantern,
Never had enough you know,
So I always borrowed some cents to cover the next nights
And yet those too hardly helped
But thanks to the moon,
On some nights, I sat by the door,
Looked at her, swim in the vast dark greyish sky
Despite being alone, she always made her way
And so, I hoped foolishly,
Believing you were my moon,
That you would always find your way
And I see you did,
But not to the doorstep of my heart,
But another, and so it aches,
From the long cracks running,
From the roof to its foundation
Why foolish heart?
The naivety of a young mind,
Now wrinkles of an old soul we nurse
Like grief, why this much pain?
Why do I still hope?
Even now, that my eyes water,
As my heart bleeds from these deep painful cuts
Why foolish heart? WHY?!